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Louche
12-28-2006, 12:20 PM
No women there, so no Sesil K....

The Doping Excuses Hall of Fame

When athletes are accused of using banned drugs, their explanations can range from the profound to the absurd. Here are some winners.

JUSTIN GATLIN, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Testosterone in 2006
Excuse: The 100-meter co-record holder unwittingly received a testosterone-spiked rubdown from a vindictive masseuse.
Outcome: Eight-year ban

TYLER HAMILTON, CYCLING Busted for: Blood doping in 2004; blood from someone else found in his system
Excuse: He was a chimera – a person with two distinct genetic cell lines, either from his mother or from a twin fetus he absorbed in utero. Subsequent testing didn't support either claim.
Outcome: Two-year ban

JAVIER SOTOMAYOR, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Cocaine in 1999
Excuse: The Cuban high jumper blamed the Mafia. His government blamed the CIA.
Outcome: One-year ban, stripped of Pan American Games gold medal

JUNSUKE INOUE, BILLIARDS Busted for: Methyltestosterone in 1998
Excuse: The 58-year-old wasn't taking the stuff to improve his pool game but to keep his cue stiff. "My wife deserved to be satisfied," he said.
Outcome: Two-year ban

PETR KORDA, TENNIS Busted for: Nandrolone in 1998
Excuse: He ingested it accidentally while dining on steroid-fed veal.
Outcome: One-year ban; testing found that he would have needed to wolf down 40 calves a day for 20 years to account for the levels in his system.

DENNIS MITCHELL, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Testosterone in 1998
Excuses: An evening of frolicking raised the sprinter's level to unnatural heights. The three-time Olympic medalist blamed excessive beer drinking and sex with his wife the night before testing.
Outcome: Two-year ban

DANIEL PLAZA, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Nandrolone in 1996
Excuse: Prolonged oral sex with his pregnant wife caused the race walker to absorb the steroid, which pregnant women may produce naturally.
Outcome: Two-year ban but exonerated in July 2006

ADRI VAN DER POEL, CYCLING Busted for: Strychnine in 1983
Excuse: His pigeon-racing father-in-law fed him pie made from doped-up birds.
Outcome: Retired in 2000 after an accomplished career.

http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/15.01/dopingexcuses.html

mrjiggyfly2
12-28-2006, 12:38 PM
Does Methyltestosterone work???
;D

catz33
12-28-2006, 12:43 PM
No women there, so no Sesil K....

The Doping Excuses Hall of Fame

When athletes are accused of using banned drugs, their explanations can range from the profound to the absurd. Here are some winners.

JUSTIN GATLIN, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Testosterone in 2006
Excuse: The 100-meter co-record holder unwittingly received a testosterone-spiked rubdown from a vindictive masseuse.
Outcome: Eight-year ban

TYLER HAMILTON, CYCLING Busted for: Blood doping in 2004; blood from someone else found in his system
Excuse: He was a chimera – a person with two distinct genetic cell lines, either from his mother or from a twin fetus he absorbed in utero. Subsequent testing didn't support either claim.
Outcome: Two-year ban

JAVIER SOTOMAYOR, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Cocaine in 1999
Excuse: The Cuban high jumper blamed the Mafia. His government blamed the CIA.
Outcome: One-year ban, stripped of Pan American Games gold medal

JUNSUKE INOUE, BILLIARDS Busted for: Methyltestosterone in 1998
Excuse: The 58-year-old wasn't taking the stuff to improve his pool game but to keep his cue stiff. "My wife deserved to be satisfied," he said.
Outcome: Two-year ban

I respect that! ;D


PETR KORDA, TENNIS Busted for: Nandrolone in 1998
Excuse: He ingested it accidentally while dining on steroid-fed veal.
Outcome: One-year ban; testing found that he would have needed to wolf down 40 calves a day for 20 years to account for the levels in his system.


Holy Cow!


DENNIS MITCHELL, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Testosterone in 1998
Excuses: An evening of frolicking raised the sprinter's level to unnatural heights. The three-time Olympic medalist blamed excessive beer drinking and sex with his wife the night before testing.
Outcome: Two-year ban

[smiley=hyst.gif]

DANIEL PLAZA, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Nandrolone in 1996
Excuse: Prolonged oral sex with his pregnant wife caused the race walker to absorb the steroid, which pregnant women may produce naturally.
Outcome: Two-year ban but exonerated in July 2006

That was quite the trip down-under!

ADRI VAN DER POEL, CYCLING Busted for: Strychnine in 1983
Excuse: His pigeon-racing father-in-law fed him pie made from doped-up birds.
Outcome: Retired in 2000 after an accomplished career.

http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/15.01/dopingexcuses.html

Ti-Amie
12-28-2006, 03:48 PM
Mariano Puerta - Wife's menstrual cramp medicine. 8 year suspension reduced to time served IIRC

Sesil K - She was pregnant. I guess her people figured no one would know this was an old form of blood doping specific to the Eastern European nations. Two year ban.

Kirkus
12-28-2006, 04:59 PM
DANIEL PLAZA, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Nandrolone in 1996
Excuse: Prolonged oral sex with his pregnant wife caused the race walker to absorb the steroid, which pregnant women may produce naturally.
Outcome: Two-year ban but exonerated in July 2006

So the oral sex defense worked? He was exonerated.

mmmm8
12-29-2006, 07:09 AM
DANIEL PLAZA, TRACK AND FIELD Busted for: Nandrolone in 1996
Excuse: Prolonged oral sex with his pregnant wife caused the race walker to absorb the steroid, which pregnant women may produce naturally.
Outcome: Two-year ban but exonerated in July 2006

So the oral sex defense worked? He was exonerated.


It reminded me of the way Becker said he didn't father that child by claiming it was only a blowjob. And when the DNA proved the baby was his, he said that she didn't swallow and somehow impregnated herself with his sperm.

Pierre1
07-02-2008, 04:10 AM
Well, Floyd Landis lost his case with the international body that governs sports, still says it was the lab what did him in. No Tour de France for you...again. He will appeal...again.

He has pretty much bankrupted himself with legal fees.

Chinese swimmer ingested steroid at BBQ - banned for life. He may even be right, but the pig in question was in no condition to testify.


The Chinese Swimming Association confirmed yesterday that Ouyang Kunpeng, the country's leading backstroke swimmer, had failed a routine, out-of-competition random urine test on May 1, causing a major embarrassment for the hosts of this summer's Olympics.

The drug concerned, clenbuterol, is widely used in China's pig farms and can enter the food chain. In 2006, 336 Shanghai residents suffered food poisoning by pork tainted with the weight-loss steroid, popular among bodybuilders.

As a result of this incident, BOA officials have expressed concern that athletes who eat out in Beijing's restaurants may unwittingly be taking in banned drugs along with their food. Sweet and sour pork, therefore, will be off limits.

Huffington Post

craighickman
07-02-2008, 06:01 AM
So the oral sex defense worked? He was exonerated.

Interesting. Guess they couldn't prove he didn't have it.

missinandre
07-02-2008, 08:13 AM
Junsuke Inque....Hilarious!


I hope....his wife..was satisfied!!!!!!:cheesy::cheesy::p:p

Pierre1
07-11-2008, 11:52 PM
The Tour de France - what are we going to do with these guys?

Spanish cyclist, Manuel Beltran, claims he is innocent, although he has yet to say why he peed EPO.



A professional since 1995, Beltran began his career with the Mapei team, and also rode for Banesto and Team Coast, before helping Lance Armstrong to the last three of his seven Tour de France wins with the US Postal and Discovery teams.

Beltran is the fourth former Armstrong team-mate to test positive for doping; the others were Floyd Landis, Tyler Hamilton and Roberto Heras.

This year marks the 10th anniversary of the 'Festina Affair', when organised doping was uncovered in the then France-based team, leading to many of the current anti-doping systems.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/other_sports/cycling/7502763.stm

Pierre1
07-17-2008, 10:48 AM
3rd rider expelled - took out his team with him. He was known for his explosive mountain racing (sound familiar, Lance and Floyd?) Riccardo Ricco had a hematocrit level well above the limit considered normal. He said he's always had a huge amount of red blood cells, even as a little boy. :rolleyes:

Earlier, Spanish rider, Moises Duenas Nevado was detained by police after testing poz for EPO. His hotel room was stocked with syringes, needles, and medical drip bags. Don't leave home without them, I say.

This event is now the equivalent of professional wrestling and should be designated as Exhibition only.

Same should have happened during McGwire/Sosa home run years. We got suckered.

dntech
07-23-2008, 02:08 AM
There's some funny excuses in that list. Hadn't heard the story about Becker either.